Is Dissociation Normal?
Have you been confused about dissociation?
It’s no wonder you’re confused, there seems to be a lot of mystery behind dissociation.
For example, you see the word spelled different ways on social media these days (like, is it dissociation or disassociation?).
You may be wondering where you’re at on the dissociative spectrum, like if your dissociative symptoms are “normal.”
When you see images or Tiktoks related to dissociation, it is usually there to induce feelings of despair and hopelessness, as if it is inherently bad.
To make it even more complicated, there are supposed “experts” out there who refuse to recognize dissociative disorders as “real.”
If experts cannot agree, you do your own research and end up getting mixed information which is frustrating and unhelpful.
I’m here to help make dissociation easy to understand.
The following is what I learned when I trained at the Trauma Recovery Institute in Austin, TX created by Dr. Colin Ross, one of the world’s top experts in all things dissociation and trauma.
First of all, dissociation is a normal part of every day life.
We all experience some degree of dissociation. Dissociation is the opposite of association. So yes, dissociation can be normal, even adaptive, to cope with trauma and stress.
There is a misconception that you should get rid of your dissociation and be present all the time in order to be a balanced, healthy adult. To be polite about it, you couldn’t get through your day without healthy dissociation. It’s a skill we all learn, but it can be used in a balanced and unbalanced way.
This can apply to anything in the universe, but to keep things simple here are some examples of how this could show up for you!
Examples of healthy dissociation.
The typical end of the dissociation spectrum looks like when you’re driving your car and you are pretty much on auto pilot. When you get home, you may notice you don’t recall what you saw on the way home. You may not have even been aware that you were operating a vehicle that weights so much, surrounded by many other cars on the highway.
You may be so bored in a job meeting that you detach from the speaker (i.e. your boss who can act annoying and demanding), and so you think about your happy place or make a mental checklist of all the tasks you need to do instead.
When you read a book, you escape the present moment and immerse yourself into another universe to the point you may not notice hunger cues or the rest of the world around you. You may be consciously or automatically ignoring your hunger to get through that chapter.
Think about people who have come out of accidents or been attacked by an animal. Often times they are injured, and yet they do not report any pain immediately after the injury. We must be able to dissociate from pain, emotionally or physically. If there was no option, life would be pretty unbearable.
If you’re still doubting whether dissociation is natural: I give you the opossum, the supreme leader in dissociating and playing dead when threatened!
Examples of unhealthy dissociation.
However, sometimes dissociation is normal, sometimes it’s not. When you move toward the other end of the spectrum of dissociation, more severe degrees of dissociation occur. Unhealthy dissociation interferes with your day-to-day life and has a string of more severe, frequent symptoms.
Unresolved trauma including years of childhood abuse and neglect can cause severe dissociation. Some people relate to the concept of the “inner child” as a metaphor, or it can be a distinct voice inside who holds intolerable feelings and memories. Often times, a child part of you may be unconsciously sitting in the driver’s seat or making decisions that should be handled by an adult part.
You may misplace your keys so often that you’re at risk of being fired. You may find yourself in a place not knowing how you got there, and you have frequent memory gaps. You may experience another identity taking control over your body and people around you say that you’re behaving differently, as if you’re possessed.
These are just a few examples that may or may not resonate with you. Dissociation is all a matter of degree and experiences are unique to every person!
Do you need therapy?
Therapy may be required to figure out if you experience unhealthy dissociation, and you can learn how to re-associate with yourself, others, and the world in healthy ways if this is what you truly desire. In therapy with me, there is no pressure to change or do anything unless you choose!
You have lots of therapy options in Virginia Beach, VA, and the healing process starts with getting clear about your symptoms, your goals, and establishing trust with your therapist.
Your therapist should know how to assess for dissociation and trauma. You need a mental health professional that you really click with. The goals need to be broken down into realistic steps. Often times with severe dissociation, healing can take years, not weeks or months. Stages of recovery for severe dissociation looks different for everybody, but it is possible to make progress with hard work, dedication, patience, and a warrior therapist!
Depending on your frequency and severity of symptoms and other factors, talk therapy may be recommended before Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART). Your level of safety and degree of readiness for the rapid, deep emotional work in ART will be discussed with your therapist. The next step is to book a free 15-minute consultation with me!
I specialize in Accelerated Resolution Therapy, trauma and dissociation, addiction, autism and ADHD, depression, anxiety, poor self-image, and the LGBTQ+ community.